Those balls look pretty dangerous.
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
I knew this night was headed for bad when I was drinking cherry bombs out of a sippy cup in the shower
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
he just fucked me for my cheese..
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
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