he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
I feel like a great embryo-shaped weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
Congratulations, you are no longer the only person who has watched me drunkenly pee on their furniture.
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
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