there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
I woke up this morning to a lot of blurry photos of a swan i must have chased down the riverbank and a handbag full of loose haribo.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
Who wrote "the chamber of secrets has been open, enemies of the heir beware" across my bathroom wall?
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
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