Erica just called me. She woke up in a storage closet in Mike's building with one shoe and no bag. Can you check your photos from last night to see if she had it at the bar?
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
It's Valentine's Day, I figure for sure we'll have sex today, right? Wrong. I tried unsuccessfully for like an hour to get him to fuck me. Now he's asleep and I'm on my way to join the public library.
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
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