Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
Just saw a squirrel crossing the road in a crosswalk..my morning has improved exponentially.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
Hangover Status: I've been bedridden longer than that kid from The Secret Garden. It's not looking good.
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
Just remember I’m your roommate with extremely questionable morals
Exactly, what could possibly go wrong
Randomize
