Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
I feel like I've wasted too many painkillers on hangovers
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
I lost my vibrator temporarily and for some unknown reason my first thought was that you might have stolen it. But then I realized you would never do that because you know it keeps me from killing people. But I am overtired and lacking in faith.
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
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