She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
He didn't get how "starting a flash flood in my thunderhole" was a sexy euphemism. Deal breaker.
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
Randomize
