Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
Well, after emptying the contents of my stomach into a fucking rose bush, the only things moving through my digestive system are pills, coffee, and my own lip gloss. If that gives you any idea what kind of a day I'm having.
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
This bowl is so big, I just said out loud, "I'm going to die here" as I blew smoke out the cat door. Merry fucking Christmas.
Ok so I'm not gonna ignore the fact that you had sex on a frat basement floor and spent the last 4 years wondering how you got HPV
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
Randomize
