shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
No need to clean the puke on the driveway. The squirrel is eating it up.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
I'm hungover in the park, and some guy just handed me a business card for his church. I can feel Jesus' disapproval running through my fingertips
I picked the lock on the bathroom door and sang him a song while he pooped. Why is he mad?
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
Don't ask but i need a priest, a calzone, a litre of gravy, and exactly 7 oreos
And a bag of nachos
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