I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Randomize
