roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
LMAO!!! just remembered you said this to me last night. "sometimes you post too many Jesus tweets. It's not that that's really bad... But I roll my eyes and you should know that."
I was drunk but it's true
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
Randomize
