I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
Why did you fed-x me a peanut butter sandwich?
It seemed like the thing to do. There's popcorn on it too.
STOP smoking sooo much weed. Damn
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
Randomize
