The shirt is mine, the pants are mine, the bra not so much
I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
You know that voice that tells you to do something spontaneous after 1am? Don't listen to it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
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