Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
To celebrate your birthday last night, I got drunk and sang drift away in buffalo wild wings. Happy birthday. The entire bar sang the chorus with me. It was magical.
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
Randomize
