Passed out watching pirates of caribbean with vodka in hand. Woke up to jenna jameson, with vodka gone.
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
Our apt smells like hot shit marinated in oregano and cumin. No more taco truck dinner, fuck face. The wall paper is peeling.
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
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