No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
She kept crying and asking why I couldn't look more like Dennis quaid.
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
I'm so high I have morphed into the monopoly man. Or maybe the Pringles guy. I don't know but I have a mustach now
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
Randomize
