I was just walking through Burbank and saw a hobo using solar panels on his shopping cart. We must be in trouble if the hobos are researching alternative sources of fuel...
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
The only thing worse than being arrested is the fact the cop confiscated my green dinosaur costume.
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
Randomize