Got a toothbrush?
One girl and one boy is just not enough.
Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
Randomize
