but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
Dude, I woke up in the middle of the night and your room mate was just standing there at the foot of the bed, watching us sleep.. you don't remember me shaking the shit out of you to tell you this?!
This could explain the reason why I've been finding his clothing and keys scattered in random parts of my room..
AND THIS DOESN'T WORRY YOU?!
The best part was her genuine shock and total "I didn't know" look when we said she couldn't cook a steak in a microwave.
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
i don't know what part of 'duct tape bikini waxes' seemed even a little okay in our drunk minds, but i'm never drinking with your sister again
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
Well, i'm not hugging a bag of cheetos and crying while I watch Friends wishing that we were Ross and Rachel. So clearly I'might doing better than last night.
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
Randomize
