Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
Note to self: never go down on a girl first thing in the morning…its like opening a grilled cheese sandwich
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
I bought a fake diamond ring to wear, not only to bars to keep the creeps away, but so that I'll be judged less by the front desk girl at Planned Parenthood
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
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