Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
This guy legit just tried to LSAT formal logic his way into my pants. Contrapositives and everything.
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drunk yet?
Well I just did the worm on an empty dance floor while the bridesmaids were serving cake. You tell me.
I'm straight up riding in the back of my truck in a bean bag chair right now. Feet propped up and four loko in hand. Glorious.
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
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