i was born a porn star she said
I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
Randomize
