you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
you said the mailboxes were turning into babies and they started crawling away. then you cried and asked me how you were gonna get your college acceptance letters
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning.
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
I want you to know. From the bottom of my heart, that you are a great friend, a beautiful person, and one of my favorite people in this world. But if you ever send me that many messages again at 4am I swear to God, I will push you in from of a fast running rhino
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
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