I am puke
It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
I'm literally about to create a tinder account. Just so someone drives me to get food.
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
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