This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
You told me to ditch them in the park, and when she jumped onto the car to stop us, you told me to scrape her off against a parked Jeep. That drunk.
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
Just reminding you that you are currently drunk spooning a chair saying it "loves you unconditionally". No more rum.
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
I think God is sending me all these 20 year olds to make up for wasting my 20's in that crappy ass marriage. Thanks Big Guy!
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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