He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
Didn't realize he fucked me in a bed a dog is always in until my face swelled two sizes and I had hives all over my body. This is God's way of punishing me for having amazing sex.
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
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