The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
I don't know how this happened but I got an email thanking me for being a Waffle House regular. HOW DO THEY KNOW?? Maybe I need to stop going there shitfaced.
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
The zombie version of you bit my friend's hand. No more zombie crawl for you. Not ever.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
Randomize
