I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.
my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just saw Santa sitting on a restaurant patio drinking beer and using his free hand to gesture to cars that he's watching them
In the middle of me riding him, he stopped me and said "You're the kind of person who would be restrained for being obnoxiously drunk on an airplane, huh?"
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
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