hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have no idea why my husband is mad that I came home at 4 am & all I want to do is eat spaghettios. It's not fucking spaghettios fault.
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
Yelled "don't taze me bro" as the police officer tazed me. Cross it off the list.
Randomize