he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
Drake has all the answers
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
You kept telling everyone that you were as sober as a camel. I have yet to figure out what that means
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
Randomize
