God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
explaining to a nurse how i all most cut my finger off playing beer pong, she def just hand me a AA booklet.
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
I'm reading 50 shades of grey and masturbating while he's doing insulation downstairs. Maybe I can get him to bring me a sandwich
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