I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
It's official we're now working from home permanently. I'm getting paid to have sex and sandwiches. I hit the lottery.
Randomize
