i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
fuck dude i blacked out on a tuesday. what am i doing with my life?
Winning.
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
Randomize
