You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
Sex and sushi don't even sound good right now... I might be on my death bed. To my Liz, I leave my extensive movie collection and my drinking supplies. To Olive I leave my car. Cause every Scottish terrier needs a 2010 Camaro.
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
I walk into the pharmacy and I'm like "I need three morning after pills" and the guy was like "uhhhh". All I said was "we didn't plan it, we all just got laid the same night"
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
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