I'm gonna get wrecked tn I might have to keep my phone at home cause I'm sure ill send you really weird txts
can you come get me and bring me shorts and a shirt
maybe shoes and water too
oh and maybe a noose to hang myself
I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
Never name a vibrator after ashton kutcher
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
His gf just liked my changed relationship status. She's gonna shit bricks when she finds out he left her for me. Bless her little heart.
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
I went to the strip club tonight. I had never gone, and in a panic I gave the dancer giving me a lap dance a handshake and introduced myself. Redefines business casual.
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
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