a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
im just gonna lie here and collect money in this whoppers bag while sprawled out on this bench and explain that its to buy weed for my hangover
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
I'm too high and old for this...
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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