Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
Just found out my mom tried to sue the birth control company when she got pregnant with me...love you too mom.
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
Randomize
