im on my way to getting "i just graduated college with no money, no job, and no plan" drunk
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
I peed in a 7/11 last night. Like literally pretended I pretended I was shopping, looked around, and peed on boxes in the corner. No more tequila
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
Randomize
