I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
Who knew you could get a drunk in public when jogging with your dog?
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
After my shift today I'm going on a bender. Not saying this so you'll stop me, just a heads up to invest in Tylenol, Gatorade, and Jack
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
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