She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
ATTENTION: just found out of have strep. if we have had sex in the past week, might wanna go to the doctor. if you plan to have sex with me in the next 20 days go buy some condoms. stupid antibiotics.
Randomize
