real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
I wish Michael J Fox could read me bedtime stories
He could rock you to sleep
it only takes four glasses of wine for me to ride an elephant with a stranger.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
You know that joke about taking tylenol pm and jerking off? you don't always win. sometimes you wake up in the morning naked lubed up cock in hand to the realator and would be perspective buyers laughing at you
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
I'll just give him your contact info, and you'll somehow manage to get laid. Which will make me feel like your vagina's agent or something.
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
I balled in the shower for 20 minutes, rolled up to the meeting late looking like a gremlin, and my one night stand was standing there in a suit
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
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