You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
so my bro's bff came over...we had an awkward "yeah we fucked and can fuck later, but let's just pretend it didn't happen in front of the family" hug.
so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
To celebrate your birthday last night, I got drunk and sang drift away in buffalo wild wings. Happy birthday. The entire bar sang the chorus with me. It was magical.
Her Grandmother felt me up AND paid for dinner. If she doesn't get her shit together I'm gonna be her Step Grandfather.
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
i texted "amiibo vore" to my insurance agent instead of someone else. do you think they'll raise my rates out of disgust?
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
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