More tranny stories later!
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
Just saw a guy doing jumping jacks at the gym. I don't even have to create a punch line for that
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
He tried to throw up into a beer bottle. It was a complete disaster. Vomit went everywhere. It put the Bellagio's fountain to shame.
Randomize
