She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
people are starting to question the shark bite story
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
he just asked me to email him a handle of captain morgans...how sober do you think he is?
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
He wouldn't stop calling me so I sent him a text saying "I'm dead. Dead. Leave me alone." And he replied with "so can I see you then?"
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
Randomize
