sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
Wine is the only reason I'm making it in the real world
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
Randomize
