I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
Randomize
