I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
he was CRYING into my vagina
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
I hate you so much right now. You got us kicked out of my favorite bar because your drunk ass was hogging the Bluetooth jukebox and would play NOTHING but that goddamn skeleton song. IT'S NOT EVEN OCTOBER YET.
Spopky scrzy skeletonssz
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
A+ Viking dick
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
Randomize