Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
Getting a high five from your dog when you're stoned is one the greatest rewards of being a pet owner.
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
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