If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
I look better un-naked...
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
You are not allowed to borrow my car ever again. It smells like a hobo orgy happened in my backseat with a hint of onion. What did you do.
There is a 5-year old here fighting 'drunk monkeys'. He tried to knock a drink out of my hand with a plastic light saber...
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
It's still 8am.
Yeah, but its wine drunk. WITH A DOCTOR. THAT MAKES MY MORNING CLASSY.
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
Randomize
