I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
I'm thankful I didn't get drunk and shit my pants this year. 🦃
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
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